Hey Cucumber Guy: An Open Letter
You, Cucumber Guy. Yes, you. The one in the restaurant kitchen adding the cucumbers to the salads. You did it again. You served me an otherwise well-crafted salad with cucumber slices like hockey pucks. What am I supposed to do with these? Weight down important papers? Make cucumber water? Treat my crow’s feet to some quick moisturizing therapy?
Cucumber Guy, I propose your delegating the fine slicing to us is no minor inconvenience. Consider the downstream effects